let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
