Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
