You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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