just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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