Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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