two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
