turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
