Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Randomize
