Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
