If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
