i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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