If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize