I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
