oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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