I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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