Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Just pee around me
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
