p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
