like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Randomize
