What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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