she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize