Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Randomize
