Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
