Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
my shit smells like andre
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
