Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize
