ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
barbara walters just said penis...
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
