Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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