Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I still have a little drunk in my system
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
