Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
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