There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
