Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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