i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
