A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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