I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize