They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
