I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
