i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Can I color on your dick again?
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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