R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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