batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize