my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
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