Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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