please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
