My underwear smells like fireworks.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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