no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
