I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
