can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
