when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
