her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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