You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize