I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
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