Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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