I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
